Monster Shack Movie Reviews

Summary: Asbestos is your friend! You thought asbestos was bad for you? Nooooo….not at all! A little light music and a friendly narrator will change all that! As a young couple sit in their living room dreaming of a new home, the narrator (Big-N) explains just what a home means to people, "Home brings a [...]

Summary: Experience the magic of plastic wrap! A car drives up. A 1950′s family piles out of the car for a picnic. It is Dad’s first day of vacation and they discover that amidst all the confusion of the previous day, they’ve forgotten to pack something to cover the picnic table. (Ahhh…the big issues of [...]

Summary: Maybe this is Darwinian selection at work… After watching the opening credits we see a montage of dynamite blasts. We learn, unsurprisingly, that thousands of people die each year from accidents in the home. OK, I’ll buy that. Such accidents, as we are shown, include leaving the iron tipped over on a shirt while [...]

Atomic Alert (Elementary Version) (1951) Summary: Instructing elementary school kids on what to do during nuclear attack The film begins by showing a cartoon atom overlaid over a child’s eye. Cue title card. Cut to a classroom where young boys are learning about radioactivity. The group of youths is gathered around a Geiger counter as [...]

Summary: A nostalgic look at the first transatlantic jet flight featuring the Pan-Am Boeing 707 A nice quicky by Pan-Am show casing the joy of internation flight. We are quickly informed that in the year 1954, a new flight was inaugerated: Flight 1000. The suspense builds as the narrator shows us how all the normal [...]

Thanks again to Sean for submitting a guest review…I just might have to double this guy’s salary some day… Enjoy Mission To Mars!

ATTACK OF THE SCI-FI SOAP OPERA SERIALPART TWO by Sean Ledden Mission to MUSH (OOPS, I mean MARS) Mission to Mars came out in 2000, and unlike Contact, it avoids the God question entirely. This should be refreshing, but unfortunately it is so besotted with sex and romance it doesn’t have another idea in its [...]

  Creature from the Black Lagoon: Time’s Black Lagoon Author: Paul Di Filippo Publisher: DH Press Book review by Sean Ledden 1954’s film Creature From The Black Lagoon gave us one of movieland’s truly iconic monsters, and a testament to the Gill-Man’s long-lasting appeal is Paul Di Filippo’s imaginative, if flawed, 2006 novel, Creature from [...]

Directed by Jean Rollin Tagline: “God help us if they rise again!” Run Time: 90 minutes Before we begin, I’d like to make something perfectly clear about this movie. It sucks. Watch something else. Throw your TV out the window. Run away. But if you enjoy crappy movies, then, brother, this will be your Shangri-la. [...]

Written and Directed by Jerry Warren Tagline: Her thrills rip forth in wide wild adventure! Run Time: 102 min “We’re vampires alright…but only in a synthetic sense.”- Vampire girl After the release of The Wild World of Batwoman (WWOBW from now on), director Jerry Warren was promptly sued by the owners of the "Batman" character. [...]

Written and Directed by David Worth Tagline: “In another time… in a world ruled by tyranny and violence… only one man can stop the nightmare” Run Time: 92 min Other Titles: “Mad Rider” “Very bad mothers! Very bad mothers! Very bad mothers!”- Supersonic Speed Cycle I guess it’s about time we did a nice little [...]

Directed by Richard Ashe Written by Bill Finger and Charles Sinclaire Tagline: The rising moon creates a monster Run Time: 90 min “There is an answer…and I think I know what it is…and it makes me sick to think about it!”- Johnny Longbow Are you tired of run-of-the-mill werewolf movies? Bored with the usual ‘werewolf [...]

Directed by Kiyo Sumi Fukazawa, Atsuo Okunaka Written by Sakyo Komatsu, Kouji Tonaka Run Time: 97 min “No!…I don’t wanna be killed by a monkey!”- Johnny Imagine yourself as a child at the zoo. The summer sun is high in the sky, the roars and cries of the animals fill the air, you’re eating ice [...]

Written and Directed by: Robert J. Gurney Tagline: “From Time Unborn … A Hideous She-Thing!” Run Time: 66 min Other titles: "Cage of Doom ", "The Girl from 5,000 A.D." Summary: Scientist break the "time barrier" and bring back an unexpected visitor with sparkling fingernails and spacey high-heels. Recap: Two scientists, Prof. Erling and Victor, [...]

Written, Produced, and directed by Tom Graeff Tagline: "Thrill-Crazed Space Kids Blasting the Flesh Off Humans!" Run Time: 86 min Other titles: "Invasion of the Gargon" Our current feature presentation, “ Teenagers from Outer Space” was horribly written and directed. The, ahem, special effects are truly some of the worst I have ever had the [...]

Directed by Irwin Allen Based on the novel by Arthur Herzog Jr., Screenplay by Stirling Silliphant Tagline: “It’s more than a speculation – it’s a prediction!” Run Time: 156 minute Director’s Cut (Yeah, baby! 2 and a half hours of cheese!) “I never dreamed that it would turn out to be the bees…They’ve always been [...]

Written and Directed by Jeff Lieberman Tagline: “This was the night of the CRAWLING TERROR!” Run Time: 92 min “There’s a lot of spaghetti here…it may take us ten, fifteen minutes to finish it. Now that’s a bigger head start then you deserve!”- Sheriff What can I say? This movie seemed too bad to pass [...]

Directed by David Winters Written by Maria Dante Tagline: “There is nowhere to hide from the enemy within!” Run Time: 93 min “So tell me Dave, your Viper was equipped with a new high-density atomizer escape system, right?”- Commander Jansen Space Mutiny is a film so completely and absolutely awful that it leaves one breathless. [...]

Directed by Robert Hutton Tagline: “Up from the bowels of the Earth!” Running time: 76 min Other titles: “Tomorrow You Die” As the tag line states: “Up from the bowels of the Earth!”…Indeed. This lovely little slime-ball of a film was directed by actor Robert Hutton (who coincidentally stars in it, who would have thought…). [...]

Directed by Edward L. Cahn Written by Lou Rusoff Tagline: “Hypnotized! Reincarnated as a monster from hell!” Run Time: 77 min “A creature out of time…the first life form of someone living today…over a million years old!”- Detective Sergeant We open by seeing the mysterious Dr. Carlo Lombardi (Chester Morris), circus hypnotist and all around [...]