Machine Head (2000)

Directed by Leonard Murphy, Michael Patrick Written by Leonard Murphy, Michael Patrick In a nutshell: An amusing mixture of Re-animator and small engine repair. Run Time: 80 minutes Tagline: “Recycling has a whole new meaning!” Here comes yet another item from the infamous "Catacomb of Creepshows" boxed set…marketed as "Hours of Spine-Chilling Tales", but let’s [...]

Kottentail (2007)

Written and Directed by Tony Urban Run Time: 90 minutes 25 Words or Less: Mutant rabbit bites man. Man mutates and attacks scantily clad women. Dennis laughs. The Cast FredericoCould a rabbit this cute be the source of so much mayhem? Why sure, because he’s genetically mutated! Hans Köttentail (Nathan Faudree)Hans’s quiet life comes to [...]

Frankenfish (2004)

Directed by Mark A.Z. Dippé Written by Simon Barrett, Scott Clevenger Run Time: 84 minutes In 25 Words or Less: Mutant fish invade our precious swamps and eat rednecks. The Cast Sam Rivers (Tory Kittles)Sam, the suave city-slicker M.E. who’s a country boy at heart, and a swamp expert without peer. But when Frankenfish shows [...]

Megalodon (2002)

Directed by Pat Corbitt Written by Gary Tunnicliffe, Stanley Isaacs Run Time: 75 minutes 25 Words or Less: Evil oil drillers wake up a giant, crabby prehistoric shark. Hi Lites Cute reporterShe’s cute. She’s a reporter. Let’s just leave it at that. CGIAcceptable CGI in the film, but too much mini-sub chomping…a bit boring after [...]

Monster (2008)

Monster (2008) Directed by Erik Estenberg Written by Erick Estenberg & David Michael Latt Run Time: 90 minutes   In 2008 Cloverfield took the concept to new “heights” (sarcastic laughter) with an estimated budget of $30 million, a very cool monster design, and a cast of plastic 20-somethings. It went on to gross $170,602,318 worldwide, [...]

Mercury Men (2009)

From the Better Late Than Never Department: The Monster Shack takes great pride in trashing the (gag) “Syfy” channel, but I was recently shocked, yes shocked!, to find it presenting something genuinely good. Thrilling even! And that thing is…..drum-roll….. The Mercury Men. It is, to quote it’s very cool retro poster, “The return of the [...]

Mega Shark vs Giant Octopus (2009)

Written and Directed by Jack Perez Run Time: 90 minutes Tagline: Winner…Eats…All! Yes! Get ready for the movie that went straight to video in 2009, the movie that will have you pulling your hair out, the movie that will have you spewing beer out of your mouth in laughter, the movie that features your favorite [...]

Birdemic: Shock and Terror (2008)

Written and Directed by James Nguyen Run Time: 90 minutes Rod (Allen Bagh)Salesman, eco-warrior, and fisherman. Rod manages to survive the “birdemic” mostly by luck rather than smarts, and certainly not by acting. Nathalie (Whitney Moore)Mandatory love interest and hot-chick. Fair enough. Rick (Colton Osborne)Rick the sexaholic, annoying guy. Will the birds kill him?…tough question. [...]

Boa vs Python (2004)

Directed by David Flores Written by Chase Parker and Sam Wells Run Time: 92minutes Tagline: Get Ready To Rumble… Not too much to discuss here, so this review is going to be a bit shorter than usual. I was excited to watch this Bulgarian quickie-production when I first saw the DVD cover proudly displaying 2 [...]

Lady in the Water (2006)

Directed by M. Night Shyamalan Written by M. Night Shyamalan Co-Starring M. Night Shyamalan Produced by M. Night Shyamalan Run Time: 109 Minutes Tagline: Time is running out for a happy ending. Like most people on the planet, I was terrifically impressed by M. Night Shyamalan’s 1999 debut The Sixth Sense. I was wrapped up [...]

District 9 (2009)

Written and Directed by Neill Blomkamp Run Time: 112 minutes Tagline: You are not welcome here Peter Jackson’s latest production District 9 is an wonderfully ironic look at man’s inhumanity to man, and man’s inhumanity to inhumanity. Basically: What if alien refugees sort of, well, parked their spaceship at our planet and couldn’t leave? Yes, [...]

War of the Worlds (2005) (plus bonus review! Independence Day (1996))

ATTACK OF THE SCI-FI SOAP OPERA SERIALPART THREE By Sean Ledden War of the Worlds – or – quality time with the kids And now, regrettably, we come back full-circle to Monsieur Spielberg. Remember how I complained in Close Encounters of the Third Kind of our long immersion into Neary household trauma? Well, now that [...]

Mission To Mars (2000)

ATTACK OF THE SCI-FI SOAP OPERA SERIALPART TWO by Sean Ledden Mission to MUSH (OOPS, I mean MARS) Mission to Mars came out in 2000, and unlike Contact, it avoids the God question entirely. This should be refreshing, but unfortunately it is so besotted with sex and romance it doesn’t have another idea in its [...]

Cloverfield (2008)

Produced by J. J. Abrams Tagline: “Some Thing Has Found Us” A guest review by stalwart contributor Sean Ledden Most of the movies ridiculed, I mean critiqued, at the Monster Shack are prehistoric artifacts from a murky past. Born from the swampy fringes of a by-gone Hollywood, they lumbered across the land seeking to thrill [...]

Battlefield Earth (2000)

Directed by Roger Christian Written by L. Ron Hubbard, Corey Mandell, J.D. Shapiro Tagline: “Prepare For Battle” Run Time: 119 minutes Review by Karl Hoegle This “movie” starts out with exciting slime green lettering informing us that it is now the year 3000, and Earth has been ruled for the past 1,000 years by a [...]

Exit Wounds (2001)

Directed by Andrzej Bartkowiak Tagline: " What Can Two Men Do Against A Gang Of Crooked Cops? Whatever It Takes." Run Time: An 101 excruciating minutes. Sigh. Review by Karl Hoegle Let me start this review (my first!) out with an astonishing fact: OUR HERO does not repeat not use the patented ‘get threatened with [...]

Submerged (2005)

Directed by Anthony Hickox Tagline: “Under water, under cover.” Run Time: 94 min Review by Sean Ledden Like its doughy, stone-faced hero, Submerged is tough. Brutal. Ruthless. It wastes no time before starting to beat the crap out of the viewer with a headache inducing jackhammer montage similar to the one used to torture Malcolm [...]